I have been reading cards in some shape or form for a long time now, around half of my time on this planet so far. Although we are always learning and developing, I can quite confidently say that I know my way around a Tarot deck pretty damn well. I'm also painfully self conscious around people I don't know. It's probably a throw back from having been bullied as a child. I was a bullies dream being ginger, overweight and a bookworm!
Although school was 20 some years ago now, these things have stayed with me and despite really wanting to do it, I've always shied away from reading face to face for strangers or at events, preferring to read by email. I love meeting new people and am very social, I've just always worried I'll be judged badly or laughed at despite any attempt to rationalise my fears. You can imagine how much this has held me back as a reader and personally in general. So, as it often does, the Universe in her unending wisdom decided to give me a nice big kick up the arse. I'd been getting a little braver, doing a live feed in the Facebook group I co run and posting a couple of short videos on my fan page. Then I got a phone call out of the blue. A lovely lady not too far from me was having a get together and wanted me to go read for her and her guests. I explained I don't do parties and don't drive. What if you were collected and taken home she said? After chatting a little I decided to take the plunge and said yes! I explained my nerves and she said there was no need. While taking down all her details I then realised she was a very close friends old boss! I felt more at ease already knowing this was someone my friend new well and trusted. I was still a little surprised I had agreed though.
Over the next few days I thought about what decks to take and spreads I'd use. I got some new business cards printed up and a pretty new reading cloth as all of mine had developed a small stain or holes somewhere on them as they do! What else did I need? I decided to arm myself with my amethyst cluster, a pair of battery operated candles, tissues, a timer, snacks to keep me going and water too.
I did have a peek at my cards to ask if it would go well and got the 6 of Wands! Huzzah! Couldn't ask for a better card than that really.
The evening came and off I set. My hosts were very welcoming and showed me to a small bedroom where I would be seeing each guest privately. I sat on the bed with a round table between me and the clients chair. I didn't feel as nervous as I expected to and was soon set up in my space and ready to welcome the first person.
I read for 9 people at 20 minutes each that evening, men and ladies both, aged between their early 20's and late 60's. Everyone was so nice and each seemed to take something of value from what I said. I would have preferred a few more specific questions to work with , but we got some hopeful;y insightful general life area reads. Out of the 3 decks I took with me for the guests to choose from, the standard Rider-Waite-Smith was most popular, perhaps because it is the most well known so has an air of familiarity to it for those new to Tarot.
I absolutely loved it and can't wait to do it again! The beast that was crippling my confidence holding me back as a reader has well and truly been slain.
Has Tarot helped you get over a big personal hurdle? I can honestly say it has worked miracles for my confidence and helped me to really come out of my shell. I will now be offering parties and events as a regular service as well as Skype readings. Perhaps I'll see you soon!